this would be a good song if i loved just one girl
but there's kelly, and there's mary, and i want to give each one the world
this could be a love song if i'd make up my mind
mary's fresh and kelly's so damn fly (here's why)

kelly's so cute when she's angry with me
but mary's never mad - she smiles and smiles
but she also snorts when she laughts

Chorus
kelly & mary are two girls that i love
given these two diamonds how can i choose one?
if this goes on and on
kelly & mary will be gone

this would be a slow jam if i was gettin any game
but i figure they're starting to reazlie things arent the same
this could be a rap song if i knew how to play my cards
but keeping two girls happy is so hard (here's why)

mary, she laughs hysterically when jaywalking city streets
kelly, she works at the dairy queen - free ice cream

Chorus

gone, drifting along, leaving me with a sad song
and when they finally find a guy to treat them right
ill be home alone that night

i said that this would be a good song if i hadnt done things wrong
but there's kelly, and there's mary, and they're both gone

Chorus x 2